Say My Name

Lord, what did You say when You spoke me into existence?

God, what do You call me?

What name do You have for me?

What's in a name?

What's in my name, the name You gave me?

My parents of my flesh named my flesh, what did the Father of my soul name my soul?

Do You call out to me?

Do You have more than one name for me Lord, as we do for You?

I know these You have for me: child, sheep, bride, daughter, beloved, student, servant, friend.

But is there another?

Are there more?

Is there a name like Zoe that You have for me?

Father, what do You call me when You call out my soul?

What is my eternal name?

Tell me my name, Father.

Say my name, speak it into forever, and speak it loudly enough for me to hear, to know, to be able to specifically thank You for.

Oh God, say my name...again and again.

Worth Repeating

In another blog, the Greek one, I mentioned the end of Time and what is going to happen. I think it is worth repeating in it's own blog because Revelations makes so much more sense to me now.

Two veils will be lifted in the end of earth.
First there will be the time in this world where we are absolutely living in a world without God. Satan will be in complete control. Then the second veil will be lifted and we will see the world without the Devil; it will be in complete control of God again and for forever.

Windshields

In Through Painted Deserts by my beloved Don Miller he starts a paragraph saying "Light reflects in sharp points off windshields in motion." I spent hours tearing this sentence apart, looking up every single word and wondering what the hidden message was in this sentence. I just knew there was one. I felt it. I was captivated by this sentence...And there is one. God revealed it to me sure enough, like He does if we pay attention and keep at it. And though I labored over this, I will give it to you for nothing more than the cost of you reading this quickly, because I love you, and this is what I do.

Light is a metaphor.
We are the windshields.
Another word for reflect can be rebuke.
Sharp, we need an abrupt or extreme change from the way we are living.
His Light shines into windshields who are still.

That is called Revelation. Hope you had a head in hands moment. I have had many with it.

Composure: It's Ok Eve

Occasionally I get frustrated with Eve and just wish we all lived in Paradise. But you have to understand some things about Eve and Adam's situation. One example is Devil's Confusion.

Confuse: to disturb the composure of

Composure: cool-headed resistance to disturbance; the ability to calmly do the right thing in a social situation

It's ok Eve. Besides Donald Miller proposes a question: Did they know there was such thing as a lie? If you grow up with only God, or are new to the world, an infant technically, such as Eve, would you know what a lie or a liar are? Probably not. Kids are pretty gullible. And pretty innocent.

You were new to the world Eve and the Devil confused you, just like he continues to do to the rest of us, to this entire world. We live in a world of confusion. At least we know it won't last.

Besides God gives us a remedy. He always gives us a remedy.

Composure also means calm. So if the Devil disturbs our calm, how to we get it back?

"Be still and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10

Still- motionless, silent
Calm- to reduce fear or anxiety

If you know who God is, you know He is bigger than Satan beyond our wildest dreams. And if you get lost in who God is for a while, truly focus on Him and only Him, and are motionless and feel Him in the breeze on your face and can finally hear Him in the silence, you will begin to feel more calm, feel less tempting pressure, and practice this concept on a regular basis you will forget the temptation, guaranteed. It will be challenging. You will still mess up. But maybe it would be less if we really knew how to do this.

Socical Health

Physical health + Social Health = Socical Health

I used to spend all my days connecting my physical health limitations and problems to why I am not normal socially, but I have strayed from connecting these for a while. I am going to revisit this idea (that all aspects of our personal health are connected and affect/effect the others).

And for those who would argue that I am normal socially, I am really not, because I am not normal physically. The circular reasoning should come around if you keep reading. Besides, the definition of disease is that it prevents normal functioning. It is. Look it up.

Quick review: Some of the aspects of our personal health:

• Physical
• Mental/Emotional
• Intellectual
• Social
• Spiritual
• Aesthetic

There are more, such as economic and sexual, but the bulleted ones are the ones I pay attention to. Guess what? They are all connected. I took a class on it. Called Personal Health. And if one is having a bad day, then chances are others will be having bad days too. If one is having a good day, chances are the others will have a good day too. This isn't an absolute, but it tends toward true more often then not.

Think about it, when you are depressed you are often physically not feeling good. When you are in the hospital physically not feeling good then family and friends come and visit you often suddenly feel better. The aspects of our personal health affect/effect each other. This can be good and it can be bad.

So lets say I feel like crap physically every day of my life, practically literally? How will this effect everything else? Well, that depends...Lets look at socially. Lets look at talking on the phone. Here are a combination of thoughts from my aunt and me about talking on the phone:

• I am a slow thinker, and a deep thinker. It takes me a while to trudge through all the thoughts. Talking on the phone tends to be a quicker thinking game, which I am not very good at. I spend all day lost in thought, and it may take me weeks to perfect one sentence as a writer. The thinking involved in conversation isn't something I do well. It really isn't. I process slowly and carefully, and thus don't really like something I am not that good at. It isn't my fault I think differently, is it?
• Thinking is exhausting, especially the quick thinking. Can't we just think silently and infrequently and slowly for a while? Be alone together, that kind of thing. I am tired. 32 flavors of tired. Formulating thoughts is exhausting and that is what I labor over all day as a reader and a writer. The brain is a muscle right... or something.
• What I want to say never comes out quickly, and if I force it quickly, it comes out wrong and then I have to explain what I was really trying to say. When I write quickly or am talking quickly the words that come out never sound right. They are close but not exactly what I was trying to say. And then, more thinking is involved when I try to correct what I just said. Exhausting.
• My skin hurts. My hair hurts. The glasses on my nose hurt. Being in one position for too long, more than five minutes, hurts. My body cramps up, tightens up, and aches. I hold the phone, cell phone, with my pointer finger kinda holding the weight of the phone, and I don't realize it hurts when I am holding it, until half an hour later when we hang up, and then I have to splint my finger because it is killing me. My hand hurts too. My wrist. My arm. Holding the phone is so hard for me to do. 32 flavors of pain.
• So then to have to put a limit on how long we can talk, for like only five minutes or so, is rude and I just don't sound friendly if I do that. Or in the middle of them pouring their heart out to me or telling me a story I am like, "I'm sorry my finger is broken, I have to go. Call in a couple weeks when I have recuperated." I am not sure how nice that really is, or if I will still have friends.

These are just a few thoughts. And the talking on the phone thing can easily with your brains be imagined with similar communicating situations, like typing on the computer or writing a letter--oh my, writing a letter....my hands can't open a bottle of water, and you want me to write a letter...I'm sorry, but try again.

So yeah, there are realistically aspects of communicating and being social that I can control, but if you take a good look at how I feel physically, I think a lot of it isn't in my control. Imagine having the flu. You are sucked of life, of energy. You are achy all over. You have a bit of a sore throat. You haven't eaten much or drank much. You haven't showered in days. You haven't slept because of all of this. Feel icky yet? Good. Because now you know how I feel almost every day.

When you have the flu do you want to pick up the phone and call all your friends? No you don't. You want to lounge around, mainly because that is all you can do. Do you want to go out to dinner? No you physically can't. Do you want to sit at your computer and check all your emails? No you don't. That is my life. I have a disease. This disease prevents me from functioning normally. My physical health situation affects/effects my social health situation. End of lesson.

Hide And...

I have one question for you:

What do you seek?

But don't give me the answer. Answer yourself honestly so that you know what your answer to God is. I would bet that the answer will scare you. My answer usually scares me. Remember, our answer can determine our forever.

Are You Sure?

Tozer, still in Keys To The Deeper Life, page 52 asks us if we are sure we want to experience being filled with the Spirit of God. Here is what he tells us will happen, in summated bullet points, if we do:

Are You Sure?

• Are you sure you want to be possessed by a Spirit who will insist upon being Lord of your life?
• Are you sure you want your personality to be take over by One who will require obedience to the written Word?
• Are you sure you are ready to be filled with Someone who won't tolerate any of the self-sins in your life?
• Are you sure you are ready to stop strutting your stuff or boasting, showing off to this world, to friends, to family?
• Are you ready to give the direction of your life completely over to Him?
• Are you ready to be tested and disciplined?
• Are you ready to have many loved objects (that secretly harm your soul) stripped away from you?

Well, are you? Are you ready? Sounds like a lot to me. Sounds like being Christian costs something. Sounds like a complete band and choir are involved. Sounds big and loud...

Sounds familiar to my ears...but never familiar enough.